busyb64

A different view on life

As the motorcycle season is winding to a close, I’m reflecting on how life feels so different on the back of the bike.  I’ve learned I never want to drive my own bike, that I’m so very content riding behind Steve.  Conversation with him is limited, obviously.  I find myself viewing the scenery as we ride by in a different light.  It seems more vivid, and smells more real.    Seeing the trees change color in the fall is an amazing site. 

This weekend is my 3rd trip to Tomahawk for the fall ride.   I admit, I’m still a ‘newbie’ at the whole biker thing, but I think I’ve gotten past the mouth-open shock of the sites during this weekend.  We don’t camp the same way as others do.  My version of camping is a motel with a soft bed and hot running water.  My body just doesn’t take the dampness very well anymore, and sleeping on the ground just isn’t an option.  I’m thankful Steve agrees. 

I still remember how surprised I was to see a bunch of lawyers dressed in leather in a booth advertising their services.  I found myself looking around wondering what the rest of the leather-clad people did 40hrs a week.  It was a reminder to myself to not profile or judge people based on their outside appearance.

I’ve gotten past being upset when people go out of their way to avoid me when I walk through a store or restaurant when I have my biker leathers on.  It still bothers me when parents grab their child’s hand and pull them away.  Do they think I’m going to abduct them or something?  Steve has been judged based on his long hair and tattoos too.  Too bad the people judging him don’t take the time to realize just what an amazing man he really is.  He’d give the shirt off his back to someone in need. 

Wouldn’t it be nice if this country could all just get along?  And, not be worried about the color of someone’s skin or the clothes they wear.  Maybe someday….

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Good bye Summer!

After checking the forecast on my phone, I see that today is likely the last real summer day til next year. I don’t mind the change of seasons, and love watching it snow, once. Then it could just warm up again and we could move into spring!

Here’s my 5 favorite things about summer!
1. Lots and lots of sunshine
2. Arthritis aches and pains at a minimum
3. No snow to shovel
4. Escaping for an afternoon ride on the Harley
5. lots and lots of sunshine!!

I know, I repeated the sunshine one, but I am such a warm weather woman! I just may be a southern woman at heart, but I was planted in Wisco and will likely stay here. Being around my family, especially my kids, trumps dealing with some of that white stuff.

What are your favorite summer things??

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My Adventures in Online Dating

After my divorce was final, I decided to try the online dating thing.  Living in a small town, it seemed preferable to going to the bar.  Which was pretty much my only other option, besides the internet.  The hardest part was taking a picture of myself.  I really prefer to be behind the camera, not in front of it, and I always look heavier in photos that I do in person.  At any rate, here is a list of what I learned.

1.  Have thick skin!  Not every man will fall in love at first site.  And, actually, you don’t want the ones who would.  Too needy.

2.  Men are VERY visual creatures.  Don’t spend a ton of time on the written portion of your profile.  Most don’t read it.  But, DO post several photos.  Especially a full body pic, or you will get asked for one. 

3.  Don’t be afraid to do a google search on a prospective date.  Wisconsin has a free website to look up anyone’s court record.   If someone is unwilling to give a last name, it probably isn’t someone you want to meet.

4.  Make sure you tell someone where you are going, and who you are going to meet.  Safety first!  Always meet in public!

5.  A free site will work just as well as a pay one.  I discovered the same men on several sites.  Why pay?

6.  Scammers are out there.  DON’T fall for the sob stories!!  You shouldn’t have to send someone money so they can come meet you.  If it(they) sound too good to be true, they probably are.

7.  Follow your gut instincts.  There were a couple times I regretted not following mine.

8.  Don’t be afraid to meet for a soda/tea/coffee etc first.  No need for a big dinner date to start.  If you don’t feel that there is any chemistry, you sure don’t want to sit through a big meal.

9.  It was my preference to meet in person shortly after making contact online.  Too much time spent on the phone led to false feelings of chemistry.  Turns out I was just as visual as men.  Who’d a thunk that?

10.  It isn’t uncommon for men to just want to use you for sex.  Do it or not, your choice, just be safe and use protection.  Some will want it on the first date, others will let you set the pace, but once you give it up, they may disappear. 

Now for a couple of funny stories….

I was contacted by a man who was a nudist.  Wanted to know if I had ever experienced the life style. Uh no, sorry. Not now, not ever.

I met a guy one night who looked just like Ernie Douglas from My Three Sons.  He had a tough time looking me in the eye while we were talking.  He also looked waaaaay different than his profile had led me to believe.  Shorter, and less hair.  The hair wouldn’t have bothered me, but the fact that he lied about his height did.  I faked a phone call from home, and cut the night short. 

I met another guy for an ice cream cone.  That poor man was sweating soooo bad, I thought he was going to have an anxiety attack right there.  It made me wonder just how nervous he would be if we ever made it to the bedroom.

Another guy made it past the first meet, and we started dating.  After about 5 dates, he professed to love me.  As flattering as that was, I couldn’t keep seeing him.  He ended up calling me anonymously for several months.  Finally quit when Steve answered the phone for me one morning. 

Had one guy tell me I was like saran wrap.  Since he thought I was too clingy, I stopped all calls/texts. Not that I initiated many anyway.  He had also told me that the most he had to offer was a committed relationship, but that he wasn’t even ready for that yet.  Ok.  When he told me a second time, I let him know I had heard him the first time and that since he had made it known he didn’t consider us in a relationship, that I knew I was free to date others.  He didn’t really like that either.  Can’t have your cake and eat it too.

I’m very happy I met Steve.  We met online 3yrs ago this weekend.  I can’t imagine what my life would be like without him.

Any adventures of your own to share??  I’d love to hear them!

 

 

 

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