Learning to love – MYSELF!!

on July 25, 2013

7 years ago, I moved into my own apartment.  My very own apartment.  Well, I shared it with my two kids every other week, but it was the first apartment I’d ever rented all by myself.  Something most people accomplish at 18 or 19.  I however, lived with my parents until I got married the first time, then moved into the house I shared with my first husband. 

I can remember feeling very excited, and somewhat nervous.  What if I hadn’t made the right decision?  What if I couldn’t make it on my own?  I spent the next 6-7 months enjoying the quiet and getting to know myself.  There was lots of quiet time during those off weeks when the kids weren’t home.  I missed them during the off weeks, but with modern technology, I could call them on their cell phones at any time.  As much as I was a mother first, keeping an eye on the kids and being there for them, I also learned I was a person all of my own. 

I spent time doing my homework, and learning what had gotten me to where I was.  Yes, I had a role in the whole mess.  Could I accept that role?  Yes, I discovered, I could.  Did I learn from it?  You betcha.  Will I repeat it?  Lord, I hope not.  I was even strong enough to finally accept the apology from one of the key players and thank them for helping me face what was going on.  This all sounds a bit cryptic I know, but why rehash all the details?  It made me who I am today, a stronger person because of all of it. 

I’m glad I took some healing time for myself.  It made looking in the mirror easier because I could honestly say I loved the person looking back at me.  This picture was kind of my inspiration for today’s blog.  A lesson well learned.  I’m happy to say, I never feel alone anymore, even if I am. 



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